


space song

by spacelamps



Category: Persona 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gen, Photographer Jun Kurosu, Photography, Snow, i am but a foolish film major/photography minor its fine, look. it snowed. like. real snow, other characters are mentioned but not the main focus point of the fic, rated T bc this is set on a college campus and college kids are WEIRD, solely from jun's pov, this is 90-percent projection i am Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:55:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29534382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacelamps/pseuds/spacelamps
Summary: He remembers walking to the on-campus cafeteria, a night or two ago; how the scenery of powdery snow on top of ice, paired with the song he was listening to and the snow falling, felt a lot like coming home to a place that didn’t exist.(he knows that it feels a lot like how it does whenever he’d escape his house to sit outside in the driveway at night, when things got too loud in his own head or he just needed a moment to himself, filled with the indescribable urge to justbe outside. he’d stare up at the stars and do his best to name the constellations; patterns taught to him by his father.)It’s a gentle sort of peacefulness, standing outside under the wide expanse of stars or walking down a mildly-icy sidewalk during snowy weather.It’s a gentle sort of peacefulness that he’s able to connect to this moment, standing on the top of the staircase, staring at the white sheets of snow.——or, jun gets to be a photographer.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	space song

**Author's Note:**

> drags hands down face when i say this fic is 90% projection i mean _it is 90% projection_ most the stuff in this fic are things i did when i saw it'd snowed on campus at 12:30am. (one of my friends was shocked that i'd stayed outside for nearly two hours but in my defense. i have a very horrible grasp on time bc adhd so uh)  
> anyway yall i swear im majoring in film & minoring in photography i swear i know what im talking about uhhhhhh anyway wrote this in one sitting at 6am. yeah. 
> 
> also i very much so hc jun as someone with adhd and idk if that's super obvious in this fic or not but uh,, yeah,,,, projection,,,,,,,, this may also be one of the only fics where the song doesn't entirely encompass the fic/the fic wasn't based off the song. there'll be a part at the top of the second half (i'll explain more in the end notes) but that's uh. yeah. those vibes are what i got from the song!
> 
> bit of backstory just to be safe yukino & jun are friends in this setting/au and yukino taught jun a bit abt photography!!

It feels… peaceful, almost.

Sitting at his desk in his dorm room, being a stupid college student and ignoring the work he has to get done despite being on his laptop (and had been, almost all day) because school's been called off for the week due to snow and ice.

He glances at the time—it’s after midnight.

He can’t sleep, but that’s not a surprise. Sleep has never been something that’s come easy for him.

The group chat on his phone—the one for his dorm, of course; the one with his friends is silent around this time, despite everyone still being awake to some capacity—lights up, talking about a snowball fight in front of the quad the next day. Well, later in the day at this point.

He shifts his attention away from his laptop, instead opting to clear his phone of the notifications. Once he reads through them (deciding that he’ll probably join in on the snowball fight; despite having friends he’s never really had one because it’s never snowed enough or it was during a section of his childhood when he genuinely _was_ friendless) his gaze shifts up to his window.

It’s dark outside, of course; it’s basically 12:30am. But just past his extension cord and the little succulent he has on his window sill, he can see the ground.

His eyes light up and he grins, immediately closing his laptop and rushing around his room.

He’s worried about taking his camera bag—the camera is his, of course, and not borrowed from the school, but he’s worried about what could happen if the snow gets in the bag and soaks the bottom, so he throws an extra lens into a backpack he doesn’t use for school. He grabs an extra battery and his spare memory cards (to be safe, of course).

He grabs his warmer clothes, too; he can’t freeze to death after all. (of course, he only grabs fingerless gloves because wearing actual gloves feels weird and he doesn’t know where the pair he usually wears are—more than likely at his parents’, the more he thinks of it. or lost. either are valid options.)

Jun throws the bag over his shoulder and grabs his camera with his left hand, bunching the broken camera strap in his hands. Once he confirms he has his keys in his coat, he rushes out of the dorm and into the snow.

* * *

He remembers walking to the on-campus cafeteria, a night or two ago; how the scenery of powdery snow on top of ice, paired with the song he was listening to and the snow falling, felt a lot like coming home to a place that didn’t exist.

(he knows that it feels a lot like how it does whenever he’d escape his house to sit outside in the driveway at night, when things got too loud in his own head or he just needed a moment to himself, filled with the indescribable urge to just _be outside_. he’d stare up at the stars and do his best to name the constellations; patterns taught to him by his father.)

It’s a gentle sort of peacefulness, standing outside under the wide expanse of stars or walking down a mildly-icy sidewalk during snowy weather.

It’s a gentle sort of peacefulness that he’s able to connect to this moment, standing on the top of the staircase, staring at the white sheets of snow.

Giddiness picks at him and he moves his camera to his face, careful in taking the lens cap off and making sure his settings don’t need to be adjusted (because he’d forgotten to change them once and just gotten pictures of nothing instead, and- ugh, different story for a different day).

It’s still snowing, of course—it’s coming down rather hard, Jun thinks, but it doesn’t matter. He tugs his hat further down his ears and holds his camera up, careful to stand still and _not breathe_ as he snaps the photo of just outside his dorm- apartment complex- thing. 

Whatever, it’s an apartment complex on campus that’s also a dorm; whatever.

It’s snowing and _that’s all he cares about!!_

He doesn’t have a tripod—which is, well, a shame, but he doesn’t usually _need one_ —so his pictures may come out a little blurry.

Which is a shame, but, well.

The aesthetic of it works _sometimes_ , so… 

Carefully, Jun makes his way down the steps, holding onto the railing with his right hand while his left holds the camera tightly, strap still bunched up in his hand. He’s careful not to knock it into his earbuds (because he _definitely_ needs new ones, but he hasn’t had the time) and is extra careful to not slip going down the short staircase; he saw someone almost fall on the ice the night beforehand and he _knows_ that there’s ice under the snow anyway.

But soon he touches down at the bottom of the awkward little staircase and (after kicking his boots free of snow, which will ultimately do nothing but help him maybe _not_ slip as he walks on what could be slippery concrete) walks to the other side, his eyes are lighting up again and he’s grinning brightly.

He’s careful, stepping out into the snow. He’s worried about getting his camera wet (but it should be fine; as long as nothing gets on the _lens_ ), but that doesn’t stop him from immediately pointing it out and snapping pictures of the snow.

Not all of his pictures will turn out good—he knows this; it’s one of the first things Yukino taught him when he started expressing interest in photography. You’ll sometimes think that something will turn out good, or decent, but then it _doesn’t_. And then, paired with him not liking to use flash for his pictures _plus_ it being relatively dark outside, despite the lighting on campus, some of his photos would wind up blurry… 

But, well, who cared! This was something he was doing for fun—and while Yukino’s advice was always sound and welcoming…

Well, it’s not like he did photography for a grade or anything.

He’s quick to pull his phone from his coat pocket (which is a bit of a struggle, considering that his pockets are deep) and quickly texts the dorm group chat to ask for the best places to take pictures on campus.

He knows he’s going to try and take pictures from the top of the parking garage near his dorm. Maybe he can also try the skybridge that connects two of the buildings too… After all, he _does_ have his lens that takes better pictures of things further away…

As he thinks to himself, he treks through the snow and into the parking lot, grinning to himself as the snow crunches nicely under his shoes.

He glances down, amused to find that the snow could almost cover his boots in some places.

He hasn’t seen snow like this since he was a child, he thinks excitedly.

He has to walk where people have already stepped, or have already driven over, to keep the snow from soaking into his shoes too quickly. So, of course, this means he’s walking a little awkwardly on a path carved out by a tire, but it works!

He checks his phone once he reaches the stop sign and notes that the RA had suggested the front of the library or the area between the student union and the business/aerospace building. He shoots back a quick “thank you!” and shoves his phone back in his pocket, grinning as he rushes over to the skybridge.

* * *

It’s a bit of a hassle, trying to figure out how to take the pictures that he _wants_ —but that’s all in the fun of it, like Yukino had said.

(his iso setting was also too low, of course, how did he _not_ notice that beforehand, no wonder his pictures were turning out blurred; why on earth would he think the 200 setting would be fine in night mode; no wonder his shutter speed was so slow. he bumps it up to 1600 and lets out a sigh of relief when his camera reacts much faster.)

He swaps out the lenses a few times. Sometimes the picture he wants doesn’t work well with either lens, but he makes do.

He takes pictures of the snowmen he sees on campus (delighted at the prospect of even _having_ enough snow to build snowmen; something he’d never done as a child). Takes a picture of how the seal on campus in front of the library (rumored to fail you if you step on it and don’t reach the other side of campus in less than thirty seconds) has snow moved off of it, so people can see and avoid it.

(along the way his phone crashes and dies at 60-something percent and he curses himself because, god, his phone is messed up and he _seriously_ needs to get a new one, but he’s also thankful that he brought one of his portable chargers, so at least that worked out for him. it also helped he was in the parking garage so there were dry areas to set his backpack down.)

He passes by students running around on makeshift sleds; the occasional group hanging out and talking or the occasional friends walking by as they talk amongst themselves.

(takes a picture of the strange thing being built out of snow a few inches near the seal; he has no idea how or why people would try to stack snow up like that, but he saw the two people working on it, and it left him with even _more_ questions because how on earth were they carrying the snow like that without it falling apart; it looked like a giant _brick???_ maybe he'll come back by in the morning to see if it's finished…)

It’s exciting, honestly. He doesn’t go to the other side of campus; the furthest he _does_ go is the business and aerospace building.

He walks back by the side of the library, on his way back to his dorm in remembrance of a second snowman getting built in front of the lobby for two of the connected dorms. (this is, of course, after the awkward moment where a cop patrolling campus asks if he’s okay or needs anything—yes, he’s fine, his dorm’s just over there, he’s just taking pictures, please _leave him alone_ (okay well. he doesn’t say that part out loud, but he _definitely_ tells his friends that it happened))

The snowman he’d passed by earlier had an _ass_ , and Jun can only stare at it in befuddlement and laugh because _god,_ why are college kids like this.

He _does_ get a semi-decent picture of the snowman in front of the dorm lobby, however!

(he thinks one of lisa’s friends lives in one of those dorms. they’ve spoken on the occasion and—oh, shit, lisa replied to his snapchat story about the snowman—all, but they aren’t incredibly close.)

On his way back to his dorm, he zeros in on the fenced-off building.

The urge to jump the fence and take pictures there hits him immediately, but he can’t. His boots are starting to get soaked from all the snow that’s melted, it’s leaking into his socks (ugh), and he’d already interacted with the cop that was patrolling around campus.

Also, it’s late, and as much as he enjoyed skipping school or ditching class, it’s a little different trespassing… 

He looks around and spots two people on the sidewalk across the road, messing around with the snow, and he decides that it’s probably safer to not jump the fence.

(also, he can’t exactly do anything to protect his camera, so… maybe it’s for the best if he doesn’t. for now, at least. as soon as he finds a way to fix his camera strap or gets his camera bag easier to carry, he’s hoping the fence and taking pictures, trespassing laws be damned.)

After taking a few awkward photos of the tree dangling dangerously over the fence, a few blurry pictures of the fence itself (to which he immediately deletes), and a few of the little red flag sticking out of the ground (more than likely for construction purposes; it’s now his sworn enemy because his camera lens wouldn’t let him take pictures of it because he was “too close” or whatever when he was really just-), he finally warrants that it’s cold enough to go back into his dorm. He says an awkward hello to the two as he passes them (it’d be rude if he didn’t say anything) and is careful to walk along the paths that have the snow crunched down.

He isn’t very successful, especially once he gets in front of the apartment complexes because some of the prior footsteps have been slightly covered by the snow, but… 

He’ll let himself have a moment of childish fun, running and jumping in the snow with a wide grin as he heads back to his room.

* * *

The moment he opens the door, he's sliding out of his boots, carefully setting his camera on the… cubby thing? Next to the door. He shimmies out of his pajama pants (to be fair, hardly anyone was going to see him and he’d been wearing them on and off all week), tugs his socks off, and closes the door. After putting the clothes to hang on the edge of the tub in the bathroom, he hurries back to the door (after throwing on a pair of flip-flops) so he can knock some of the snow off the boots.

(he… gets enough off at least, to put it in the tub. he doesn't think about how they're going to dry successfully when there's hardly any heat in the bathroom until hours later.)

He throws his coat in his closet and his gloves on the top of his dresser. His hat gets hung up over his towel on the back of his door.

Then, once he’s finished himself with that, he grabbed the cup of milk from his mini-fridge (he’d filled a cup of milk when he went to the school’s cafeteria earlier in the day for lunch for this sole purpose, sue him) and makes a bee-line for the small, incredibly cramped kitchen.

As he sets about making his drink, he checks his phone, and laughs at Tatsuya’s text.

_was it katsuya_ it read, despite Tatsuya’s brother having been off the force for at least three months by this point. Maybe longer, Jun can’t be sure. (his grip on time isn’t super stable anyway; it could’ve been a year or just last week). 

Lisa and Maya have both laughed at the text; the only person to not respond is Michel (who’s probably either asleep like a reasonable person thanks to Miyabi or trying to come up with new songs).

As the microwave continues to heat up his milk, he grabs his camera and sets it carefully on the further end of his bed.

The microwave beeps and he glances over at the kitchen, hurriedly rushing over so he can pull the cup from the microwave (least it beep because it's been thirty or more seconds and he hasn't stopped it) and hot chocolate mix from the cabinet (and mourn his loss of marshmallows).

Two minutes later he’s back in his room, letting his mind drift as he grabs his camera; after he puts his phone on charge and sets his drink down, of course.

_Hiraeth,_ he thinks, the word appearing in his brain from nowhere, sitting on his bed with a mug of too-hot hot chocolate on the top of his mini-fridge (which serves as his nightstand). _Longing for a home that no longer exists or never was._

It was a word he'd learned a while ago; picked up from social media.

Jun thinks back, a relaxed expression on his face as he flips through his camera roll, satisfied with the knowledge that he has another card filled with at least seventy or eighty more pictures.

_I could see it._

(he accidentally stays awake long enough to see the sunrise; he is, however, vastly disappointed to try and take pictures of it to find that the sky only welcomes him in shades of gray, sun hidden away elsewhere.)

**Author's Note:**

> _what makes this fragile world go round?_   
>  _were you ever lost?_   
>  _was she ever found?_   
>  _somewhere in these eyes_   
>  _fall back into[place](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBtlPT23PTM)_
> 
> holds head in hands i wasnt joking abt the ass snowman college kids are genuinely like this if you want proof it's [right here](https://twitter.com/spacedlamp/status/1362371775355641856?s=20)
> 
> also! for an explanation abt the stuff from the second part—that is pure, 100% projection. especially during high school during the summer, i'd kinda just slip out of my house and sit in the driveway and stare at the stars bc i just. had the need to be _elsewhere_ yknow? and i recently discovered that the song "space song" (the song this fic is named after) can feel a lot like coming home under certain circumstances; like the ones i described in the fic. 
> 
> anyway find me on [instagram](https://www.instagram.com/lost.lapis/) or [twitter](https://twitter.com/spacedlamp) :')


End file.
